


Love to Hate You

by GreenAppleEyes



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Cheating (if you squint), Dub-con grinding, Emotional Manipulation, F/M, Fluff, Lucifer is a dick, Mild Sexual Assault, Mild Smut, Sad Castiel, Sexual Content, Soulmates, Unbeta'd, grace!kink, unwanted soulmates, wing fic, wing!kink
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-30
Updated: 2018-07-30
Packaged: 2019-06-18 22:15:55
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 8
Words: 16,668
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15495861
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/GreenAppleEyes/pseuds/GreenAppleEyes
Summary: You discover your profound bond with an unwanted and unlikely archangel who happens to be possessing your boyfriend.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> If this looks familiar, it’s because it was posted to my Tumblr last year. 
> 
> Very canon divergent after s11.
> 
> Entirely unbeta'd so all mistakes are mine. I apologize in advance.

You paced in your room at the bunker, worried sick about your boyfriend Castiel. He hadn't been answering your calls or texts and both Sam and Dean refused to tell you what was going on. They seemed to think keeping you in the dark would be better than knowing the truth; that he had was currently possessed by Lucifer.

You suddenly heard a loud crash, followed by arguing coming from the library. You rushed out to see Castiel yelling at Sam, Dean, and… Chuck?

If seeing Chuck, (whom you'd recently learned was the literal God) wasn't confusing enough, the look Castiel was giving you completely threw you off. "Guys? What's going on? Wha…."

You trailed off when you saw Castiel roll his shoulders and large, bright white wings unfurling behind him. They were incredibly beautiful and you found yourself mesmerized by them. There was also something different about him and you felt more drawn to him than ever before.

Castiel stared at you with curiosity and stepped toward you. He reached out to grasp your chin to get a closer look when Sam yelled for him to stop. "No! You stay the hell away from her."

Castiel rolled his eyes and lifted your chin anyways. "You're a curious little thing, aren't you?"

His voice was different. It wasn't as low and flat as it normally was. You narrowed your eyes in suspicion. "Cas…? What's going on? Why can I see your wings?"

His eye widened in surprise as he pulled his hand from you before turning to face Chuck. "You actually made me one! I'm touched; but don't think that means I forgive you."

You shook your head in confusion as you started to get annoyed. "What are you getting at? What's going on, Cas?"

He turned back toward you an gently cupped your face. "Oh Princess, what I'm saying is that you're mine. Daddy-O over there made you for me."

You eyes widened in confusion and fear as you felt Sam yank you away from Castiel. "Sam, can someone tell me what the fuck is going on here?! What's wrong with Cas? Why is Chuck here?! What the fuck?!"

"Y/N, just calm down." Sam wanted to comfort you, but he knew it was time you learned the truth. "That's not Cas. He said yes to Lucifer. I'm sorry Y/N, but we need him; only for a little longer. And then we'll get Cas back."

"He did what?!" you yelled in shock. "Oh Cas, how could you?"

Luckily for him, Chuck spoke up. "Y/N, your soul was created to be compatible with Lucifers grace. You two will forever share a special bond." He turned toward Lucifer and glared. "And she doesn't belong to you. It doesn't work that way."

You stood dumbfounded staring at everyone in front of you. "So… what? Like the bond Cas has with Dean?"

Dean immediately defended himself. "Hey, I've never wanted Cas in… that way. So it's gotta be different."

Lucifer groaned. "Is sex all you apes think about? A bond isn't always sexual; but it certainly can be." You shuddered at the smirk he held on Castiels face.

You looked back at Chuck, now angry about your predicament. "Really? Soulmates with the literal devil? Thanks a lot. Fuck. My. Life."

Lucifer frowned. "Hey, words hurt."

You turned to him and snarled the only come back you could think of. "Get out of my boyfriend!"

"He let me in, Dollface." He said with a smug smirk. "You need me to help take out Auntie Amara; so you're little angel is right where he wants to be."

"Ugh!" you huffed as you stormed off.

\------------

Lucifer was, for the lack of a better term, and asshole. He was sarcastic, arrogant, and disrespectful; but you couldn't deny the pull you felt toward him. Not to mention the fact that you could see his wings and would catch yourself daydreaming about how they felt.

"Like I'd let you touch me." Lucifer said with an annoyed tone. "Disgusting."

You rolled your eyes. "Stay out of my head, Luci."

He gritted his teeth at your words. "That's not my name."

You smiled, the use of that nickname had been the only thing you could find so far that really irked him. "Whatever you say, Luci. My name isn't Princess, or Dollface, or Sweetheart, or any other bullshit pet names you call me either."

He cocked his eyebrow and smiled at you. "You are different from the others. I can feel it." He stepped closer so he was towering over you as you sat in your chair. He leaned down, placing ahh his weight on the arms of the chair so his face was only inches away from yours. "You're not even afraid of me, are you?"

Fuck, he wears Castiel well. The thought ran through your mind faster than you wanted it to. You swallowed dryly a forced a smile. "Why would I be afraid of a clipped archangel. You can't do a thing to me. Now, if you'll…"

He snarled and grabbed your throat, but not hard enough to cut of your air supply. "Even being clipped by Dad; I could still break you in half."

You weren't sure what it was; maybe the bond or maybe the fact that he was holding your neck in such a gentle manner. But you knew he couldn't hurt you; wouldn't hurt you. You pressed forward, trying to increase the pressure on your throat and smiled as he backed up to avoid hurting you.

You grabbed his hand and removed it from your throat. "See? I'm not afraid because you can't hurt me. Now, I'm trying to read here; so why don't you run along, _Luci_."

He growled and stood up. You expected him to storm off, but he picked up one your random books and plopped in another chair.

You smiled at the power you seemed to hold over him. But it worried you at the same time. He clearly felt as drawn to you as you did to him. You just hoped that it was a feeling you could get used to for the time being and not have to worry about it anymore once he was back in his cage. 


	2. Chapter 2

You sat in your room, almost in tears. You had missed Castiel terribly already; but now seeing Lucifer parade around the bunker in his vessel was making it worse. It had already been a few hours of you hiding in your room and you knew you'd have to come out eventually; your growling stomach made sure of that.

Sighing you stepped toward your door and opened it; only to be face to face with Lucifer holding a plate with a sandwich on it. "What the hell are you doing, Luci?"

His lips tightened at the nickname. "Humans need to eat. Here."

You leaned against the doorway trying to comprehend the situation. "Did you, the fucking devil, make me a sandwich?"

He rolled his eyes at you. "I can feel what you feel. I can sense your… needs. Right now, you're hungry."

"I don't need your sandwich. I need you to get the fuck out of here." You were lying; you were hungry. But worse than that, his general presence was oddly comforting to you.

He grinned and looked down at you. "Now Princess, you know that isn't true. I'm an angel remember? I can see into that little noodle of yours."

You groaned at his arrogance. "Just get the hell away from me." You pushed passed him and headed toward the kitchen to make your own food.

As you grabbed the box of cereal, you weren't surprised to see that Lucifer had followed you. You waited for some clever remark, but it never came. He simply sat down at the table in silence.

You decided to test a theory. Instead of eating in the kitchen like you usually did, you brought your bowl out to the library and sat down at one of the tables. Not even two minutes later, you were joined by Lucifer who still remained quiet.

You quickly ate your food, wandered back into the kitchen, and waited. Just as you expected, Lucifer suddenly had a reason to be in there.

"Why are you following me?" You asked harshly while crossing your arms.

He looked surprised for the briefest moment before glaring at you. "Don't flatter yourself. I'm not following you; you just happen to be going where I was going."

You grinned as you walked passed him. "For the devil, you're a really bad liar."

As soon as you exited the kitchen, you heard a growl and a crash. Clearly Lucifer did not appreciate being called out.

Soon after, he was storming toward you and you read in the library. "I will find a way to kill you, ya know!"

You looked up and smiled. "Ok sweetie. You do that." You were having way too much fun with this.

He sat at one of the library tables and ran his fingers through his hair; making it messy like Cas used to wear it. Seeing him like that only served to make you miss Castiel even more.

Lucifer must have picked up on your sudden attitude change as he looked over at you with an almost concerned expression. "What's wrong with you now?"

"Like you actually care." You snapped back. "Just never mind. I don't need you mocking me for being human."

He got up to move closer and leaned back against the table in front of you. "Well, being human is quite the ailment; but I suppose it's not really your fault that you're so… flawed."

You missed Castiel and now you were pissed and frustrated, which was the perfect recipe for tears. Crying in front of the devil was the last thing you ever wanted to do. "Fuck you."

As you stormed away, Lucifer felt something he hadn't felt since he killed his own brother; guilt. He hated human emotions to begin with; but guilt was the worst and only caused him to get angry.

"Don't you walk away from me when I'm trying to help!" He yelled after you. "Stop being so damn sensitive."

When you didn't stop walking toward your room, he ran up to catch you. He grabbed your shoulders and spun you around to face him and saw that you had started to cry as you tried to pull away from him. "Let me go, you asshole!"

He wasn't sure what compelled his next action, but he pulled you close to him and wrapped his arms around you. "I… I didn't mean to upset you…"

You struggled for a moment, but quickly found yourself melting into the embrace. It felt natural to be there. "I just miss Cas. Is he… ok in there?"

He let go of you and lifted your chin to get a closer look at you. He realized that he had never really looked that closely at your face and tried to ignore the physical attraction he was feeling toward you. "He's fine. You're boytoy isn't in any danger."

"Can I… speak to him?" You assumed he'd say no or get angry for simply asking; but you were desperate.

He pulled away from you and his face contorted in anger. "No! Why do you want to speak to him anyways? You're not his. You're mine."

"I don't belong to anyone!" You shouted back. "I want to speak to him because I miss him and I love him. Not that you would know anything about that! You don't love anything because no one loves you!"

His posture went rigid and you thought for a moment he might actually hurt you this time. His wings twitched behind him and faded from sight as his expression changed to what looked like sleepy confusion.

"Y/N…?" He asked in a low voice; Castiels voice. "What's going on?"

You wrapped your arms around him as he stood on unsteady legs. "Cas! Baby, are you ok?! Did he hurt you at all? You gotta cast him out."

He placed his hand on your cheek to calm you. "I'm ok; he mostly just leaves me alone." He paused and looked at you with sad eyes. "I'm sorry, Y/N, we still need him. No other vessel, except Sam, is strong enough to contain him."

As much as you hated it, you knew he was right. Lucifer was the only living archangel left and he was needed to help Chuck take out the Darkness. "When this is over, we're getting him out of there. We're getting you back to normal. I love you, Cas."

"I love you too, Y/N." He smiled softly before pressing his lips to yours.

You hummed at the contact that you had been missing. You weren't sure how much time you had with him; so you weren't about to waste it. Threading your fingers through through his hair, you encouraged him to deepen the kiss.

Feeling his tongue against yours was more of a comfort than a turn on at this point; until his hands began to roam. He backed you up against the wall and planted his thigh between your legs and gripped your ass. He trailed his mouth down to your neck, causing you to moan out his name. For the first time in what felt like forever, everything felt right.

As he pressed in tighter, he pulled your hips toward him; encouraging you to grind on his thigh. He always was able to get you worked up quickly, but this time was faster than any other time. You really must have missed him even more than you thought.

You loosened your grip on his hair, and removed his jacket and trench coat. Once discarded, you moved to unbutton his shirt. He grew impatient and ripped it open, causing buttons the fly everywhere, and tossed it to the floor. Castiel clearly missed you just as much as you missed him as he was becoming more and more aggressive and passionate.

He returned to kissing your neck and having you grind on his leg even harder; the friction feeling almost too perfect. You went to wrap your arms around his neck again when they came into contact with something firm, but soft to the touch. Feathers?

Opening your eyes, you saw bright white wings sprouting from Castiels back. Except you couldn't see Castiels wings; only Lucifer's.

As soon as your lust-fogged brain realized what was happening, you wasted no time pushing him off you. "God dammit, Luci! What the fuck is wrong with you?!"

He stared at you with lust-blown eyes, still breathing heavily from the intense activity from a second ago. "I came back and we were already engaging. You seemed to be enjoying yourself so I decided not to spoil the fun."

"Ugh!" you shouted. "You're such an animal! I feel so disgusting now."

He stepped closer again, leaning down far enough for you to feel his breath. "Why is that? Is it because you liked it? Because, deep down, you could feel that it was me and you wanted it?"

You grimaced at his close proximity. "Go fuck yourself."

You stormed back down to your room and slammed the warded door. Sitting in your bed you thought about his words while a mixture of guilt and self-hatred washed over you. He was completely right.

 


	3. Chapter 3

How could you want anything from someone like Lucifer? You had Castiel; your sweet, loving, badass angel. Your angel that Lucifer just happened to be wearing at the moment. That had to be the only reason you felt anything; you missed and loved Castiel so much that you'd almost take him in any form.

As you drifted off to sleep, you hoped you could at least have a break from the nightmare of your real life. Unfortunately, this night was one of many that were plagued with nightmares. Your life of hunting and watching close friends and family die bloody made sleepless nights a common occurrence.

You finally got out of bed in defeat. If you couldn't sleep, you'd at least try to make yourself useful and there was hours and hours of research ahead of you anyways.

As soon as you reached the library, you were instantly reminded why you holed yourself up in your room in the first place. Lucifer sat at the library table, surrounded by books, and had stripped down to just Castiels white shirt.

"Morning sunshine," Lucifer said in a sing song voice without even looking up at you. "Why are you even awake right now?"

You rolled your eyes and groaned. "None of your business."

You sat down and grabbed one of the books you had set out to start in tomorrow. Before you could open it, Lucifer stopped you.

"Already read that one; nothing helpful. Here, try this one." He handed you another similarly old, heavy book.

You opened it and immediately saw that it wasn't in English; it was all Enochian. "What the fuck am I supposed to do with this? I haven't exactly had time to learn every language in existence."

He grunted and reached over to place his fingers on your forehead. You pulled back before he had a chance to touch you. "The fuck do you think you're doing?"

Finally looking up at you, he rolled his eyes; something that should have annoyed you, but somehow seemed endearing at the moment. "I'm trying to help. I can teach you Enochian if you'd let me. I'm surprised my little bro hadn't done it already." He looked down and shook his head. "What a waste. He could have already done so much to improve you, but didn't."

"Maybe he doesn't think I need improvement." Your acidic tone getting no reaction from him. "Did you ever think that you might be just as flawed as us humans?"

That got his attention again. "Do you even realize who you're speaking to? Is it so hard to get it through that little monkey brain of yours? Humans are filthy, flawed creatures and I find it incredibly insulting to be compared to them."

You chuckled at his annoyance. "You're flawed too, Luci. I'm able to get under your skin so easily and yet, you don't like being away from me. You get angry when someone challenges you instead of trying to reason with them. And the worst offense? You think you're the victim. Sounds pretty flawed to me."

His lips were pursed tightly, nostrils flared, and he was breathing heavily. No one had ever shoved his flaws in his face like this and came close to surviving. But he also knew you were right; which only served to anger him further.

"People might be nice to you if you're nice to them. You should try it some time." You pushed away from the table, deciding that you were done socializing with the devil for a while. You could only handle being alone with him for so long.

You wandered back to your room, pleased with winning the argument against Lucifer. Unfortunately that left you a little too distracted to realize you didn't close the warded door.

\---------------

You woke up slowly the next morning; feeling more refreshed than you had in as long as you could remember. For once, your night was filled with pleasant dreams of happier times, childhood memories, and moments spent with those closest to you. You smiled, thinking about how you somehow won the sleep lottery.

Your pleasant mood was instantly soured by someone shifting and clearing their throat next to you. "Morning sunshine."

Startled, you tried to move away from Lucifer who was sitting in your bed with a book. Your reflexes weren't at their top performance in that moment and you managed to scream and flail backward. You got tangled in your blanket and fell to the floor.

Lucifer moved toward the edge of the bed and peered down at you. "Well, that was graceful."

Standing up quickly, you were thankful you didn't sleep naked when Castiel was there. "What the hell are you doing in here? How'd you even get in?"

He gestured to the slightly ajar door. "A warded door only works when it's closed. You basically invited me in."

You growled at your own incompetence of the night before. "A slightly open door is not an invitation. Now, will you kindly get the fuck out?"

"You're not even going to thank me?" He asked with mock hurt in his voice. "You don't honestly think you're well rested for no reason, do you?"

You crossed your arms and glared at him. "What are you talking about?"

He hopped off the bed and stepped toward you. "Without the warding, I could hear you from the library. You were crying out for me, so I came."

Your arms fell to your sides and your mouth dropped open. "I… no. There's no way I was crying out for you."

He shrugged. "Ok, maybe not me personally. But seeing as my roommate isn't exactly available and he was being such a sad sack, I thought I'd help."

"You let Cas hear everything that you do?" You were hopeful, but also embarrassed. Would he know how long it took you to realize you weren't kissing him the other day?

He sighed. "Some. It seems that it helps keep him from scratching at the walls in here. If he knows you're safe, he stays calm."

You smiled at how much Castiel cared about you. The smile quickly fell when you realized he might know about your bond to Lucifer. "Luci, does he know? About… us?"

He smirked in a very un-Castiel way. "Are you worried that your little angel won't want you anymore because you belong to me?"

"I don't belong to you! Chuck even said that." You yelled in a rage.

He laughed at your expected reaction. "You're so cute when you're mad. But to answer your question; no, he doesn't know yet. I thought it was best to keep that info from him. Wouldn't want to give him a reason to worry."

You huffed and put your hands in your hips. "Worry about what?"

He reached out to trail a finger down your cheek. "That you'll inevitably choose me over him."

You opened your mouth to argue, but found yourself too angry to form a decent response. "I… you… ugh! Fuck you!"

He giggled and rubbed his palms together. "Oh! This is fun! You press my buttons and I press yours. I haven't had banter like this in a millennia."

For some reason, everything seemed to click at his statement. "Do you try to piss me off because you think it's the only way I'll interact with you?"

Your calm response was not what he had expected. He cocked his head slightly. "What do you mean?"

"You do!" You exclaimed. "Jesus, you're like a dog at the pound that has only gotten attention when it misbehaved. I can't believe I'm saying this; but I actually kind of feel bad for you."

He narrowed his eyes at you and tried to stare you down in an intimidation attempt; which of course didn't work on you. "I don't need the pity of some… _human_."

"Oh but Luci," you cooed. "I'm not just some human, remember? Look, I'd like to help you be less of an asshole. You need socialization like an abandoned puppy; but I'm not gonna give you any of you keep trying to bit me. Understand?"

"I'm not a puppy." He grumbled as he continued to glare at you.

"Then stop acting like one." You said flatly. "Now, I need to get dressed."

He cocked his eyebrow and rubbed his lower lip with his forefinger. "No one's stopping you."

You gave him a warning look. "Go."

His lower lip popped out in an exaggerated pout. "I still haven't gotten a thank you. If you want me to be polite, you have to be also. I didn't have to spend all night chasing away your nightmares."

You sighed loudly and gritted your teeth. "Thank you. But next time, don't just sneak in my room."

He smirked before turning back around to leave. "Whatever you say, Y/N."

After he was gone, you caught yourself smiling about him using your name instead of one of his condescending nicknames. You shook your head trying to clear your mind. He was Lucifer, the devil, the archangel who had previously murdered your boyfriend and was now occupying his body. You were supposed to loathe him; regardless of some silly bond created by Chuck.

You hated him for everything he had done to the people you loved and humanity in general. You couldn't stand the idea of him being out of the cage and walking freely. But if you hated him so much, why were you still smiling?


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Dub-con content warning.

After getting dressed you decided you needed some fresh air and, more importantly, to be away from Lucifer for a while. The bunker was always in need of various supplies; mainly food because the Winchesters had large appetites.

You didn't want anyone suspicious about needing to leave so suddenly, so you just sent Sam a quick text letting him know where you'd be going.

As soon as you pulled out of the bunkers garage, you felt better. You still worried about Castiel; but you knew that Lucifer needed him at the moment, so he was currently safe.

Making your way into town, a large cloud of black smoke caught your attention. Your lifetime of hunting caused you to immediately turn toward the direction of the smoke. If someone needed help, you wanted to be there to provide what you could.

Pulling up to the burning house, you saw that the fire department hadn't arrived yet. There was a frantic couple coughing and sitting outside in the yard.

Approaching them quickly, you yelled out, "Hey, are you guys ok? Do you need me to call 911?"

"Please!" the woman choked out, reaching for you. "My… son…" She was having trouble speaking and pointed to the house.

You quickly ran towards the building when you realized what she had meant. You covered your mouth and nose with your shirt and stayed low to the ground as you tried to search for the child.

You managed to find the small boy huddled in one of the back rooms, but you were starting to get dizzy once you reached him.

"Hey buddy." you said weakly. "Lets…"

You tried to pick him up but found yourself much weaker than normal. The smoke around you had become thicker and it was getting harder and harder to breathe.

Your mind immediately went to where it always did when you were in danger, Castiel. You were praying to him before you even realized what you were doing. It only took a second for you to realize that he might not actually be able to hear you.

With your desperate need to save yourself and the boy you prayed to the only angel who could come help you. "Luci…"

Before you could choke out any more words, he was standing in front of you with a displeased expression on his face. "Why would you get yourself into trouble like this?"

You tried to argue, but only coughed as your lungs felt like they were burning. He rolled his eyes and lowered his hand, causing the flames to die down and go out. He pressed his fingers to your forehead and the burning feeling in your lungs was gone.

You turned toward the boy, who looked to be around 4 years old, and noted his face was turning blue. Looking up at Lucifer, you pleaded with him. "Please…"

He smirked slightly and sighed before pressing his fingers to the boy's forehead. The normal color returned to his face and he began to cry.

Lucifer immediately grimaced at the sounds coming from the child. "Suck it up, kid, you're fine now."

"Lucifer!" you whispered angrily. "He's scared. Stop being a dick." You turned back to the boy who had begun hugging you. "Let's get you to your parents, yeah?"

After returning the little boy to his parents, you and Lucifer made quick work of getting out of there.

\---------------

Back at the bunker you sat in silence next to Lucifer; who kept staring at you with that same dissatisfied look on his face.

You finally had enough of his staring. "What?"

He cocked his eyebrow at you. "What? Why must you feel the need to fling yourself towards danger when it has nothing to do with you?"

You rolled your eyes at him. How were you supposed to explain compassion to the devil? "Had I not gone in there, that little boy would be dead." You hesitated for a second, remembering that you hadn't saved the boy at all. "I'm glad you showed up. Um… thank you."

His lip twitched briefly, but his expression remained the same. "It's… fine. Just don't go trying to kill yourself for no good reason again."

"It was a good reason. I wanted to help them." You knew it was no use trying to explain your actions to him; he wasn't capable of caring about anyone else, right? "What made you show up so fast? I barely made out your name."

He sighed and looked at you thoughtfully. "I don't exactly get prayed to a lot and I could hear the fear in your voice." He shifted, seeming to realize he was showing a sliver of vulnerability. "Plus, what good is a new toy if she's burnt to a crisp?"

"You know, it is ok to admit you didn't want to see me get hurt." You said while idly playing with your fingernails. "It's ok to care."

"I don't care." He defended. "One of these days I'll tire of you and kill you myself."

You noted that his threats were even becoming weak. You knew it was hard for him to express anything other than anger. "Well that may be the case, but you still saved me and that little boy today. I appreciate what you did; so thank you."

Leaning toward him, you placed a chaste kiss on his cheek. He tensed for a moment, not used to such a tender action. You smiled at the bewildered look on his face. It was bittersweet to see because, in that moment, he looked even more like Castiel.

You started to walk away when you felt him lightly grasp your wrist. "Wait."

You cocked your head and searched his face for proof that he cared more than he wanted to let on. Unfortunately he had a pretty good poker face. You shrugged your shoulders, silently asking him to tell you what you wanted.

"In suppose you could make it up to me." He said with a wicked grin. "You do, sort of, owe me."

You rolled your eyes and tried to suppress the grin on your face. "Alright, fine; you do have a point. What do you want? Let me guess; slave for a day?"

"I have plenty of humans and demons willing to be my slave. What would I need another one for?" he asked with a smirk. "My wings got pretty fucked up in that building and grooming them alone is a pain; it's much easier when someone else does it."

You stared at him in confusion before asking, "You want me to groom you? I don't even know how."

He stood up and began peeling layers of clothes off until he was standing in front of you shirtless. You couldn't ignore the shiver that ran up your spine as he arched his back and stretched his wings wide; letting out a satisfied groan.

He sat backwards in the chair and leaned forward against the table. "It's easy, just straighten out the feathers. Gently though, angel wings can be… sensitive."

You reached out slowly, as you had obviously never purposely felt an angels wings before. You jumped and giggled when his wing twitched as soon as your fingertips came into light contact with it.

Regaining your composure you started running your fingers through the feathers; straightening some and letting loose ones fall to the floor. "They're softer than I expected." You smirked at the thought of the devil having soft anything.

He let out a grunt and you assumed he simply didn't appreciate thought of in such a way. "It's ok to not be so damn rigid and stubborn all the time. I can tell how tense you are; you really need to relax or else you're gonna get an angelic ulcer."

You were surprised to not get a witty response from him; only more groans as you continued to groom his wing. The noises he was making were almost pornographic. Maybe it was a similar feeling to getting a massage or having someone brush your hair for you and he was just that relaxed.

As you got closer to the point where his wings met his back, he groaned louder. Each sound he made was starting to distract you. There were very similar to the noises Castiel might make in bed with you. You immediately felt a pang of guilt after wondering if Lucifer would sound the same.

Shaking your head, you returned your focus to the task at hand. You could feel how tight the muscles were and took it upon yourself to try to loosen them up. Starting at his spine, you dragged the heels of your hands outward and across where his wings sprouted from his back. As soon as you did so, he sat up straight and groaned loudly. "Ohhh fuck!"

You pulled your hands back quickly, assuming you had hurt him. "I'm sor…"

"Don't stop." He panted out, interrupting you. "I just didn't expect that. Keep going."

You placed your hands back down and repeated similar motions massaging the thicker portion of his wings. Each stroke and swipe of your hands pulled groans from him that, whether you liked it or not, went straight to your core.

You finally had enough. You couldn't be letting yourself be affected in that way by him. It was time for a cold shower and some separation from him. "Alright, feathers are straightened and you seem more relaxed. You good?"

Lucifer did have a few, small redeeming qualities as of late. Patience was not one of them. Before you could process what was happening, he had you on your back on the table with his weight pinning you down.

You were about to tell him off, when you were silenced with his tongue entering your mouth. He kissed you with the the same level of passion that Castiel would after lengthy periods of separation. You knew you should push him off, but you found your fingers threading through his hair as you kissed him back.

He grunted as you felt his grace move your hands away from his hair, and back down to his wings. You grabbed on to the same thick muscle you were massaging earlier and dug your fingers in, earning a low groan from him.

You couldn't be doing this right now; you needed to stop. You loved Castiel more than anything and you weren't about to cheat on him with the devil, special bond or not.

You turned your head to try to pull away from him, but he only moved his lips to your neck. Letting go of his wings, you tried to push up on his shoulders and tell him to stop. You stumbled across your words as he ground his pelvis against yours; causing his prominent erection to press against your clothing covered core with the perfect amount of friction.

"Luci…" you meant for it come out as a protest, but it sounded closer to a moan. His mouth and tongue on his neck combined with the movement of his hips were starting to short circuit your brain.

"Mmmm, I know." he growled lowly against your skin, almost sounding like Castiel. You felt a familiar tingle spread over your body that slowly concentrated on your breasts and between your legs. "I feel it too. I tried to deny it; but I need you."

You tried to stifle the loud moan that escaped you as his grace felt like fingers rubbing through your embarrassingly wet folds. He growled and thrust his hips more erratically at the feeling of your arousal. "Fuck! You're gonna make me lose it and I'm not even inside you… yet."

Yet. That simple word seemed to break his lustful hold on you. As perfect and amazing as everything felt with him, it was wrong and you couldn't let it go any farther than it already had. "Lucifer sto…"

He cut of your words by attaching his lips to yours again. His muffled moans grew louder and his hips moved faster until they came to a sudden stop. He let out a low, guttural groan of your name as his orgasm overtook him.

He buried his face in your neck as you felt his grace melt away from your body. Taking advantage of his current state, you were finally able to push him off of you. "For fucks sake, Lucifer! I said stop! Get the fuck away from me!"

Your anger immediately melted to shame when you saw the confused and hurt look on his face; along with the fact that you couldn’t see wings anymore. "Cas? Baby, is that you?"

"Yes, Y/N, it's me." He said sleepily. He looked around, taking in his surroundings and it didn't take long for him to notice your flushed face covered in shame, the smell of your arousal, and the feeling of Lucifers release in his pants.

Sadness crossed his face as his eyes met yours again. "I think we need to talk."


	5. Chapter 5

Tears had already begun to stain your face as you stared at Castiel. What could you say to him? He had to have been thinking the worst of you right now.

"Cas, I…" you whispered, hoping the words would just come to you.

Castiel didn't need to read your mind to know what you were thinking; it was written across your face. He quickly pulled you into his arms and and tried his best to soothe you. "Shh, Y/N, it's ok now; he's currently incapacitated. Are you hurt?"

"No, I'm ok." As much as you wanted to sink into him, you didn't think you deserved it; so you pulled away. "I'm so sorry. Please don't hate me. I… I tried to get him to stop."

He reached out to cup your cheek, wiping stray tears away with his thumb and offered a comforting smile. "I could never hate you. Why would you ever think such a thing? I love you."

Words that normally made your heart flutter and calm you down only made you feel worse. "Cas, you don't understand. I… god, Cas, I kissed him back. And… it felt right. It felt like I was supposed to." Your words quickly fell apart into sobs.

You saw anger flash across his face, but it faded quickly. "Lucifer is known for his temptations. But, you still resisted his charms."

You took a few deep breaths, dreading having to tell him the truth about the bond. "That's not it, Cas. There's more. He and I are… connected, I guess. Chuck says Luci… Lucifer and I have a special, angelic bond. We feel so drawn to one another and I've tried to ignore it, but I can't. And seeing him walking around, looking like you? It's just… I'm so sorry."

He took a sharp intake of breath at the mention of your bond to Lucifer. "I'm sorry, Y/N, I didn't know. Had I been aware of your connection to him, I never would have allowed him near you."

"Don't do that." you said meekly. "You take the burden for everything that goes wrong. This isn't your fault."

He sighed as his shoulders slumped."You sharing a bond with Lucifer may not be my fault. But inviting the devil into my vessel and letting him near you is on me. For that, I am sorry."

"So, you're not mad? You don't hate me?" Your voice was still quiet, but you were starting to feel more hopeful.

He leaned toward you, placing his hand gently behind your head and kissed your forehead. "I don't hate you and I'm not angry. I'm merely… concerned."

"Don't worry, he doesn't seem to be able to hurt me." You tried to reassure the only fear you thought he could have.

He looked downward with a dejected expression. "Your safety is always a concern, but that wasn't what I was talking about. Lucifer has his obvious flaws, but he is a powerful archangel with a strong bond to you. He clearly has… feelings for you." He looked up at you again with a hint of pain in his eyes. "And you? I know you want to deny it, but I know you feel a pull towards him. Eventually you might not want to resist it."

You cupped his face and kissed him to stop his rant. "No. Cas I love you. I love you more than anything and nothing, even a stupid bond with the devil, is going to pull me away from you. You're all I want, you understand? Look into my head if you don't believe me."

The small smile returned to his face. You weren't lying or just trying to make him feel better. He could feel the love that you felt for him radiating off of you. "I believe you. I love you, Y/N, and we will figure this out. We will send him back to the cage when we don't need him anymore; but in the meantime, maybe you should try to keep your distance."

You nodded with a smile. "Of course."

\---------------

Avoiding Lucifer proved to be more difficult that you thought it would be. You kept the warding on your door so you always had a place to retreat to; but you couldn't stay there all the time.

Like clockwork, you stepped out of your room to find Lucifer waiting in the hallway. "Why are you avoiding me? We had such a special moment and now you're trying to pretend I don't exist."

"As special moment?!" You snapped, annoyed that he managed to get a response from you. "You tricked me into giving you an angelic handjob, then attacked me until you came in your pants and passed out. How the fuck is that a special moment?"

He narrowed his eyes at you as a brief look of concern crossed his face. "You wanted me too. You kissed me back, remember. The only reason you weren't begging me to fuck you was because you felt guilty." He stepped closer and reached out to touch your face. "Guilt is such a useless emotion, Princess, especially when you were only giving in to what felt right."

You recoiled away from him. "It wasn't right. I know it's hard for you to understand, but I love Cas. Do I feel something, a pull, toward you? Yes, but it's not the same way I feel about Cas."

"And why not?!" He yelled, getting in your face. "Did you forget who I am? He's a pathetic, broken little Seraph; but me? I'm…"

"An asshole." You said bluntly, cutting him off. "And the devil who's possessed, terrified, and even killed the people that I care about. Honestly? I can't wait until we don't need you anymore and we can toss your ass back in your little box where you belong!"

As soon as the words left your mouth, you felt regret; but you weren't sure why. You wanted you live to go back to normal; the way it was before you met Lucifer. But at the same time, you didn't want anything bad to happen to him, not really.

He must have been reading your mind because the intense anger quickly faded from his face. "So you do care about me; how sweet."

His smug smile almost made you want to change your mind. "Just stay away from me, please."

\---------------

To your surprise, Lucifer kept his distance; for the most part anyways. He still liked to be in the same room as you, but he stayed out of the way; which made it slightly easier to ignore him.

That is until the day came that you exited your room and didn't find him in the hallway. You roamed the bunker, looking for anyone and quickly realized you were the only one there. "What the hell is going on?"

You dialed both Sam and Dean, getting no answers. You even tried calling Cas' phone in case Lucifer might answer it; but that went to voicemail as well. It wasn't like them to just vanish like this and you were immediately concerned with their safety.

Did Lucifer finally tire of them and decide to get rid of them? You shuddered at the thought and prayed to him. "Please, Luci, I don't know what's going on; but don't hurt them. And if you didn't take them, please keep them safe."

\---------------

After what felt like days passed, you heard the bunker door open. You raced toward the sound, letting out a choked sob as you saw Sam, Dean, and Castiel standing before you.

You no longer felt the pull that you did while Lucifer inhabited Castiels body; but you melted against him as he pulled you into a tight embrace. "He's gone?"

Castiel loosened his grip so you could look up at him. "Yes, it's just me. I'm so sorry for everything you've been through."

You smiled through your tears at him. "Are you ok? Did he hurt you at all?"

"I'm weakened, but I'll recover." He reassured you as he pulled you close again. He let out a relieved sigh at having you in his arms again without the worry of Lucifer taking over again.

You heard Sam and Dean clear their throats causing you to peer behind Castiel to look at them. "Sorry guys. Are you alright too?"

"Yeah, peachy." Dean said gruffly. "Thanks for noticing."

Sam smacked Deans arm before looking back toward you and Castiel. "We're fine; we're just worried about Lucifer now. He's not in Cas anymore, but he's still loose."

You looked back at Castiel, who still held a reassuring smile on his face. "Don't worry, we'll keep you safe."

"Come on Cas, you look tired." You said as you gestured for him to take your hand. "We should all get some rest."

\-----------------

When you had initially dragged Castiel back to your shared bedroom, you had fully intended to just cuddle and rest with him. Castiel, however, had different plans.

You barely had the bedroom door closed when he was pressed against your back, arms wrapped around you, and face nuzzled against your neck. "I missed you."

Your heart fluttered and your stomach flipped; Castiel was the only person whom had ever had that affect on you. Smiling, you leaned back and turned your head to look at him. "I missed you too, baby."

You turned around to face him and he wasted no time claiming your mouth with his. You both hummed at the familiar, comforting flavor as you held each other close.

Castiel picked you up, bridal style, earning a squeak and a giggle from you. He carried you to the bed, laying you down gently, before shedding his jackets and laying next to you. "I love you, Y/N."

"I love you too, Cas." You pressed a chaste kiss to his lips before attempting to snuggle in next to him. He made quick work of rolling on top of you, placing himself between your legs, and kissing you passionately again.

"Cas… mmmph…" you tried to speak as his mouth landed on yours again. You turned your head slightly and pushed up on his shoulders and smiled at how quickly he relented; which was vastly different from the last time you were in this position with his vessel. "Baby, you really should rest. You just had an archangel ripped from you."

He looked down at you with love and lust swirling in his blue eyes. "My grace is weakened, yes. But I promise I am well enough to show you how much I missed you, how much I love you, and how much I need you."

Your heart fluttered at his words. Castiel didn't show weakness often; if he told you he needed you, he meant it. "Well, I'm not about to deny you what you need; especially since I need you too. I still don't want you overworking yourself; so pretend you're human for a while."

"You're so beautiful, inside and out." His voice was low, almost a whisper. "Always more concerned about everyone else; forgetting everything you've been through yourself."

You chuckled and blurted out your response. "Cas, I'm not the one that just spent the last several weeks getting ridden by Lucifer."

Castiels gaze hardened slightly and you internally scolded yourself for your choice of words. "If Lucifer had his way we both would have been in similar, yet very different, situations."

You started to voice you apology for being insensitive, but he hushed you by placing his finger against your lip. "But he didn't get his way. You may have been created with a bond to him, but you are not his; you're mine."

An involuntary moan escaped your lips as he nipped and sucked at your neck. Castiel didn't always leave marks; unless he was feeling particularly jealous and possessive. "Yes Cas; yours."

He pulled away from your neck to look you in the eyes again. "And I am forever yours. I love you, Y/N; he does not. He wishes to own you; I only wish to see you happy."

"I love you, Cas." You said, pulling him into another deep kiss.

\---------------

After what felt like a few hours you and Castiel laid in your bed, limbs tangled together and a fine coat of sweat covering your bodies. "Cas, I thought we agreed that you were going to take it easy."

He smiled widely and kissed your forehead. "I never agreed to anything; I just didn't argue."

You kissed him lightly before moving away to clean up the human way in the bathroom so Castiel wouldn't waste his grace as he had already used his reserves during your activities in bed. He grunted in disapproval of having your body removed from him earning a playful grin from you."I'm just going to the bathroom; I'll be right back."

Upon returning, you found him asleep where you had left him; snoring lightly. Even though it was a sight you weren't used to, you found it comforting to see him at such peace. You snuggled close and let him haphazardly lay his arm over you; smiling at how protective he was even wile asleep.

You laid awake for a while thinking about Lucifer. He hadn't been sent to the cage, as far as you knew, and was most likely searching for a new vessel. Part of you felt worried for him, part of you felt he deserved worse.

As you began to drift off to sleep, you simply hoped that this meant your life with Castiel could go back to normal; well, normal for being a hunter who happens gonna in love with an angel anyways.

\---------------

You'd have your semi-normal life for a while; lulling you into a false sense of security. That all changed one morning when you heard a flutter of wings accompanied by the feeling of a familiar pull. "Hey, Dollface. Miss me?"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The time skip takes place between s11 and s12 with some major canon deviation. I hope it made sense.


	6. Chapter 6

"Luci?" Your own voice betrayed you as it wavered. You had wanted to seem indifferent or even unhappy to see him; but he could sense you felt differently.

"I know, Sweetheart. I missed you too." His wife smile and saccharine tone set you on edge immediately. You knew he was off his leash now that Chuck had skipped town again.

You wanted to believe that you only felt a pull toward him because he was wearing Castiels vessel before; but the pull was just as strong toward the tall, blonde archangel standing before you. "How did you get your old vessel back? I would have thought Nick's body would have been long gone."

He looked down at his hands briefly before rolling his shoulders and letting his wings unfurl before you. He grinned wickedly at your quickened heart rate and sharp intake of breath upon seeing them. "It's helpful to have demon and witch fangirls. They'll do anything for you if they believe they'll be rewarded for it."

"What do you want?" you managed to keep your tone calm. Lucifer was no longer on his fathers leash and you had concerns about everyone's safety; so you felt it best not to anger him too much.

He stepped closer to you and reached out to cup your face. Before his fingers came into contact with your skin, you heard Castiel yell behind him. "Don't touch her!"

Lucifer turn on his heels and stood face to face with his younger brother. "Hey short stuff." He narrowed his eyes at Castiel, sizing him up. "It really is like a funhouse mirror, looking at a former vessel."

Castiels hard gaze never wavered. "What are you doing here?"

"Oh Cassandra, isn't it obvious? I've come to claim my prize." Lucifer turn back to face you and winked. "Well, I'll fully claim her later. She deserves privacy for that."

Dean and Sam heard the commotion and ran up behind Castiel just in time to hear Lucifers plans.

"The hell you are!" Dean shouted.

Lucifer rolled his eyes and sent Sam and Dean flying across the room, hitting the wall, and falling to the floor. "I've had just about enough of you. I thought about letting you live, I really did; but I can't let you meddle in everything I do, especially not my love life."

He reached his arm out toward them, causing them to immediately drop to the floor and yell out in pain. Castiel rushed Lucifer, only to be sent crashing backward.

"Luci, stop!" you screamed, getting no reaction from him. Reaching out, you grabbed his shoulder to force him to turn toward you. "Lucifer! I said stop!"

He dropped his arm, letting Sam and Dean catch their breaths. He turned back toward them and giggled. "Ooh! Full name, boys, looks like I'm in trouble."

You were terrified for the lives of of your friends and boyfriend, so you tried to keep your voice calm. "Luci, what do you want? What will it take for you to leave us alone?"

"Oh, Princess," he cooed, stepping closer again "There's nothing that will keep me away from what's rightfully mine. But unfortunately she's got these pesky little bodyguards that always seem to get in my way."

You looked at Sam and Dean, who looked ready to attack at any second. They had been your best friends for years and they wouldn't blink at dying for you. Your eyes drifted over to Castiel, who was just as eager to fight for you; die for you.

Your heart sank and you swallowed your pride as you realized the only option to keep the ones you loved safe. "What if I go with you? Will you promise me they'll be safe from you if I go with you?"

Lucifer cocked his head and opened his mouth to respond, but Castiel interrupted him. "No! Y/N, you can't…" His cerulean eyes full of fear and heartbreak.

Lucifer tapped his lips with his pointer finger as he thought about your offer. "So you're proposing that I take you with me, which I was going to do anyways, but let them live in return? That hardly seems fair."

"You wouldn't have to take me with you." you huffed in annoyance. "I'd go with you willingly. No fight, no one follows or looks for me; we just… go."

"Hmm, that's close to what I want to hear." He said with a wicked grin. He reached out a cupped your face gently with both hands. "You know what I want to hear you say."

You pursed your lips, not wanting to give in; but you didn't have a choice. "I'll be… yours."

He pulled his hands away from you and clapped then together. "Oh, this is so exciting! I'll accept your offer, with one small change." He turned to face Castiel. "I need you to say it too. I need to to be completely sure that you've accepted defeat and you know that she's mine; not yours."

"No!" Castiel growled. "She's not yours. She belongs to no one. But she does love me, something you'll never get from her. I'd rather die than let her submit herself to you."

"Cas, Luci, that's enough." You warned, fighting back tears over Castiels admission. "You have your offer, take it or leave it."

He grunted at Castiel, who was still refusing to back down. "Fine. Close enough. Let's go."

"Wait." You said, stepping backward. "Can I make one request?"

He shook his head and chuckled to himself. "You've officially been mine for 10 seconds and already asking for favors?"

You sighed, desperately hoping he'd grant your request. "I'd like to properly say goodbye, since I'll never see them again and all. I'd like to wait until tomorrow morning. 24 hours, that's all I'm asking."

"I could just wipe them from your memory." He said with a shrug. He grimaced at the brief pang of guilt he felt when he saw the flash of fear in your eyes. "Now now, Sweetheart, don't fret. I need you to remember that you chose me and what'll happen if you go back on our deal."

You flashed your best puppy eyes at him. "Luci, please? One day, then… it's just us."

He gently gripped your chin with his fingers and sighed. "Those eyes won't work for everything. But I suppose this will be a good little test for you. You can have your 24 hours; but if I find out you're scheming? Well, let's just say you won't like what happens."

You allowed yourself to smile up at him. "Thank you."

He leaned in a pressed his lips lightly to yours and you forced yourself to remain still and not pull away. You internally winced when you heard a heartbreaking sigh come from Castiel.

Lucifer pulled away and smiled warmly. "See you tomorrow, Y/N."

With a flutter of wings he was gone. Sam and Dean stared at you in disappointment; but Castiel was angry. "How could you agree to that? What is with you hunters thinking the only option is sacrifice?"

You tried to defend your actions, but Castiel clearly didn't want to listen and cut you off before you could speak. "Or is it simply just that easy to leave us behind to be with him?"

His words cut you deeply. You knew he was only letting his hurt and anger speak for him; but it didn't make it hurt any less. "Cas, of course it's not easy! This is my home; Sam and Dean are practically my brothers and you? Fuck, Cas, you're my everything. So no, this isn't easy for me; but I really don't have a choice."

Castiel didn't break eye contact, but you could tell he felt bad for his accusation.

Sam stepped forward and put his hand on Castiels shoulder. "We have a full day to figure this out. Y/N bought us some time."

"Don't you get it?!" you shouted. "This isn't something we can risk. He's one of the most powerful beings on the planet right now and someone has to keep him in check."

"That doesn't mean it's gotta be you." Dean said gruffly. "Sam's right, we'll figure something else out; you ain't goin'."

You rolled you eyes wondering why you ever expected them to take this news easily. "You three, of all people, should understand. How many times have you sacrificed yourselves for each other? How many times have you literally died for each other?"

"Y/N, that was…" Sam trailed off knowing that this situation really wasn't much different than situations they had been in as well.

"It's different because no one has to die this way. I keep him from wanting to wreck the world and you guys keep saving people from what goes bump in the night." You sighed and softened your tone as they seemed to start to understand. "Now, this is my last day of freedom and I don't want to spend it with everyone I care about being pissed at me. Let's just have an epic day so I have something better to remember."

\---------------

The day progressed how you had expected it to. The awkwardness faded to normal conversation eventually, but you could still feel the tension underneath it. Dean made your favorite burgers and tried to force himself to keep things light; but the amount of whiskey he was drinking showed his true feelings.

Sam seemed to understand the best due to the similar, but so much worse, sacrifice he made to prevent the apocalypse so many years ago. He'd give you small smiles and knowing nods from across the table.

Castiel, however, barely said a word. He remained close by but didn't engage in any verbal conversation. Not that he needed to say anything; his hard-set glare at you said enough.

As the evening approached Sam and Dean took it upon themselves to give you and Castiel some privacy for the rest of the evening.

You sat in uncomfortable silence in your room until it became deafening. "Cas…"

"I'm not letting you do this." He responded flatly without even looking at you.

You rolled your eyes and huffed. "Praise the lord! The angel speaks!"

His jaw tensed as he raised his left eyebrow with a warning glare. "Do you really think now is the time to be making jokes? We could have established a plan by now; but we just wasted the day."

"Do you really think this is the time for us to be arguing?!" Your voice was pained and desperate, but you took a breath to calm yourself. "Baby, I love you. I always will; no matter what situation I am in or who I'm bound to. Please don't make my final hours of freedom spent fighting with you. Can't we just try to enjoy the time we have left together?"

"I.." his voice was soft as his shoulders slumped and he looked down at his hands. "I can't lose you. I don't know what to do with myself without you."

Hearing the pain in his voice was worse than the silent treatment. You scooted closer to where he sat on the bed and took his hands in yours. "You'll be just fine. You were kicking ass for a millennia before I was even born; and you'll continue to do so without me."

He shook his head and smiled sadly. "You don't get it." He turned toward you and gripped your hands tightly. "I don't want to go back to who I was before you. I love you. That alone is a testament to how you've changed me; I was never meant to love like this. You own my heart and you will be taking it with you."

You knew you wouldn't make it through the day without tears; but you had wanted to try. There was nothing else you could say with words; so as the tears began to flow you simply placed your lips against his.

He remained still for a brief second, not sure if he wanted to give into the moment. He wanted to try to convince you to change your mind; but he knew it was no use. You were just as stubborn about making sacrifices for the sake of others as he and the Winchesters were.

His lips moved against yours softly. If this was to be his last night with you, he didn't want to rush it. He gently threaded his fingers though your hair and cradled the back of your head as he deepened the kiss.

You gripped his jacket and pulled as you leaned back on the bed, encouraging him to lay with you. Breaking the kiss briefly, you whispered a phrase that held so much more meaning in that moment than it has ever before. "Make love to me, Castiel."

"Of course." He smiled and looked at you with the kind of love and admiration that it made you blush and want to look away. The ache you felt in your heart knowing that you'd never see it again kept your eyes fixed on his.

You slowly undressed each other. With every new section of skin exposed it made it easier and easier to forget about the problems of tomorrow.

\---------------

The night was full of more love and passion than you could have ever asked for. Every kiss, touch, and motion said more than words ever could; not that it stopped Castiel from repeating, in English and Enochian, how much you meant to him.

You snuggled in as close as possible to Castiel and he hugged you tightly; like he was afraid you'd float away if he let go. It didn't take long for the silence to become heavy again.

Castiel spoke first as he could hear your mind swimming. "I know I cannot stop you, but I don't have to like it."

You let out a soft sigh. "I know. That's just how it is sometimes."

"It's late. You should sleep." His voice wavered as he spoke. He kissed your forehead and you could feel the quiver of his lips as he pressed them to your skin.

Fresh tears slipped down your face at the sound of his heartbreak. "We only have a few hours left, I don't want to waste it."

"You always were stubborn." The hint of a smile on his face made you chuckle.

"Only because you're so bo—ossy." The last word emphasized with a deep yawn.

He chucked and kissed your forehead again. "See. You need rest. I'll wake you in a couple hours."

You felt like a child, desperately trying to stay awake; but Castiels warm body, even breathing, and the light patterns he was tracing on your skin caused you to lose that battle.

As soon as sleep overtook you, Castiel allowed his façade finally crumble. "Please Father," his whispered voice cracking as unshed tears gathered in the corners of his eyes. "don't make me lose her. I'm begging you, don’t let him have her."

\---------------

A couple hours later, you were woken up by someone running his fingers through your hair. "Wake up, Princess. Time to go."

You blinked the sleep out of your eyes and looked up, expecting to see Castiel. Unfortunately, he was nowhere to be seen and Lucifer stood towering over where you lay.

You quickly pulled the sheet to cover the portion of your body that had been exposed to him. "Where's Cas? You promised you wouldn't hurt him."

He licked his lips before smiling. "He's fine. He's asleep technically; I didn't feel like a fight since I'm not allowed to hurt him."

You looked at the clock that sat on your nightstand and rolled your eyes. "You're early asshole. I've got over two hours left."

He gritted his teeth and glared down at you. "I am not known for my patience."

"A deal is a deal, Luci." You suddenly felt more naked than you actually were underneath his hard stare. "Can you get out so I can get dressed at least?"

He rolled his eyes and let out an exasperated sigh before snapping his fingers. "There, you're dressed. Now let's go."

You felt the panic begin to rise in your chest. "Luci, I haven't said goodbye yet. Please, just…"

He cut you off with a frustrated growl. "No! I've waited long enough. You had plenty of time to say your goodbyes. I'm not waiting any longer."

He gripped your wrist tightly and, with a flutter of wings, Castiel was left sleeping in the bed alone.

\---------------

The Winchesters returned from picking up your favorite breakfast from a small diner in town and called out for you. No response echoed back to them.

They found Castiel sitting on your bed holding the sweatshirt you had been wearing the day before. He looked up at them with glistening eyes and spoke softly, as if saying it too loud would make it real. "She's gone."


	7. Chapter 7

"What the fuck?!" you screamed shrilly as tears threatened to spill on to your cheeks. "I had 2 hours left, god dammit!"

Lucifer rolled his eyes. "Oh hush. What's 2 hours? You're lucky I gave you the extra time that I did."

You looked around the room you were in. It looked like a staged living room straight out of a home décor magazine. "Where are we?"

He smirked and clicked his tongue against his teeth. "I dunno, Princess, it's probably best if you didn't know."

It was a strange feeling to be surrounded by such luxury, yet still feeling like you were in prison. You sat down on one of the couches with a huff, wondering what the rest of your life with the devil would be like.

He shrugged before plopping down next to you. "Your life, our life, can be whatever you want it to be. You're mine regardless, but I'd prefer you to be happy."

"Stay out of my head." You complained as you scooted away from him. "And if you really wanted me happy, you wouldn't have made me leave the people I care about."

"Are you still mad about that? I think it's high time you move on." He scooted closer to you again and gently squeezed your thigh. "I think I know a good way to get your mind off it."

You ignored the twist in your lower belly and pushed his hand away as you stood up. "You're disgusting; don't touch me."

He grinned widely at you. "You'll give in eventually, Y/N. I know how you really feel about me; the pull you feel, the need for me to be close to you, and the dirty little thoughts you try to hide from yourself."

Guilt and shame ran through you. He may be completely right, but that didn't mean you weren't strong enough to resist the feelings that this bullshit angelic bond created.

He stood up from the couch and moved behind you, gently running his hands down your crossed arms. Before you could shove him away, you felt his wings wrap around you as well. It felt protective, yet possessive. "See, being mine isn't so bad. You'll see, Princess, eternity is a long time and you'll come around eventually."

Your eyes shot open, not even realizing you had closed them. You pulled out of his hold easily, as he wasn't forcing you to stay close. "What the hell are you talking about? You've got 70, maybe 80 years to torment me if you're lucky."

"Did you honestly think I'd let you grow old and die on me?" He crossed his arms and gave you a mock pout. "You underestimate my… tenaciousness; my loyalty."

"Your loyalty?" you scoffed. "You basically own me now, remember? How can you be loyal to something you feel you own."

He placed his hands on your shoulders and gently squeezed. "You really don't get it, do you? I suppose you're only human after all." You grimaced at the insult and tried to pull away from him, but he held tightly and continued. "I am just as much yours and you are mine. You'll come to understand that one day."

\---------------

The first year with Lucifer was difficult, but not as horrible as one would expect it to be. He would often insult you for one human quality; the immediately compliment you on another one. You could tell he, in his own fucked up way, was trying to make things easier for you.

Some days were certainly easier than others. He provided distractions with his wit, humor, and general insights to the universe; but he could never diminish the ache in your heart when you thought of Castiel.

It was almost a year to the date when Lucifer took note of your solemn mood. "You're so mopey. You know I prefer to see you smiling."

You were in no mood for what he wanted at the moment. "Well, Luci, I don't really give a fuck what you prefer."

"Ooh, feisty this morning." He said with a light chuckle as he slid under the sheets next to you.

You groaned and rolled to face away from him. Most nights you didn't mind him laying in bed next to you as you slept; you had gotten so used to him being close by. But tonight, all you wanted was Castiel, your angel, to be the one next to you.

Lucifer growled as he snaked his arm around your waist and pulled you close to him, resting his other arm underneath your neck and holding tightly. "Why are you thinking about him anyways?"

You hated how comforting it was in his arms, but you couldn't deny the calming effect it had. Sighing deeply, you let a single tear break away from the corner of your eye. "I'm sorry; I can't help it. I just miss him. I…" your voice cracked slightly as you tried to contain your emotions. "I don't even know if he's still ok."

Lucifer rolled his eyes. He didn't like it when you were upset; more so, he didn't like that you being upset had an effect on him. "You humans always have to worry about shit you can't control. I'm sure he's fine."

You inhaled deeply and tried to let it out as evenly as possible. "But you don't know that. I certainly don't know that. I don't even know if you…"

He rolled you around to face him. His jaw was tense and eyes ablaze with anger at the thought you had rolling in your mind. "Have I ever lied to you?! Have I ever gone back on any promise I've made to you?"

You dropped your head down, pressing it lightly against his chest. "No. I'm sorry. I'm just worried about him and the boys. I just wish I could see them and know for sure that they're ok."

He reached down and gently lifted your chin for you to look at him. He smoothed the hair out of your face and smiled. "Oh humans; you get so easily hung up on these things. You have everything your little heart could desire with me; yet all you want is the one thing I can't allow you to have."

You flashed him the biggest, pleading eyes you could muster. "Please, Luci? They don't even have to see me. It's just for my own piece of mind. Let me just see them for a bit and I promise I can, ya know, make it worth it to you."

He raised his eyebrows at you as you bit your lower lip and blushed slightly. In the year you had been with him, you hadn't yet allowed yourself to be intimate with him. It frustrated him to have to wait and he knew he could have taken you easily if he really wanted to; but he wanted you to give yourself over to him willingly.

"Well Princess," he cooed as his hand drifted down your arm to rest on your waist."Are you proposing what I think you are?"

You rolled your eyes playfully. "I think you know exactly what I'm proposing." He growled happily and tried to lean even closer to you, but you stopped him with your fingertips against his lips. "Let me see them first."

He pursed his lips and sighed. "Fine. You will have one hour and they won't know you're there." He gripped your chin firmly and narrowed his eyes at you. "Don't disappoint me by trying something stupid."

\---------------

You took a deep breath and smoothed over your clothes for the 100th time. Shaking you head, you reminded yourself that no one was even going to see you; so there was no reason to worry about your appearance.

Lucifer snapped his fingers and you found yourself alone in the bunker library. Being home, even if it was only for a hour, helped calm your nerves. Everything looked in order; just as it did the last time you saw it.

You smiled and bolted for the kitchen as soon as you heard Sam and Dean arguing about something.

"Don't you think it's kind of fast? It's only been a year, Dean." Sam sounded concerned and you quickly found yourself curious about what they were talking about.

Dean took a bite of his burger and argue back with his mouth full. "Yeah, exactly. It's been a year of him moping around. I'm glad he's finally trying to get himself together. Plus, she's a smart hunter and have you seen her? She's going to make him happy."

Your heart sank at the implication of the conversation, but you hoped that you were reading too far into it.

You wandered down the hallway to the room you used to share with Castiel; only to find it empty. The layer of dust quickly told you no one had bothered to venture inside after you left. You looked over your former possessions and smiled at the memories they brought back. Suddenly you heard the sound of a female giggling from a few rooms down.

You moved down the hallway until you were in front of the room Castiel occupied before the two of you got together. Taking a deep breath to calm yourself, you pushed the door open.

Upon seeing the naked back of a woman with long brown hair straddling an equally naked Castiel, you immediately regretted coming to see him. Sure, part of you was happy that he was able to move on; but you couldn't ignore the heartbreak at how little time it took.

You started to back up slowly, not wanting them to hear the door when you heard her moan the words that you should have been saying to him instead. "I love you, Cas."

You should have left, but you needed to know how he'd respond. Was this just sex for him or was it more? You got your answer when he sat up and wrapped his arms around her back, pulling her impossibly close. "And I love you; more than anything."

You tried as hard as you could to contain the choked sob that left your throat; even though you assumed no one could hear you.

Castiel reacted immediately as his eyes darted over to the doorway and locked with yours. "Y/N?"

Upon realizing he could see you, you took off down the hallway. You had no idea how he could see you and you knew Lucifer would be pissed once he found out.

As you ran up the stairs and out the door, you prayed. "Luci, I'm done. Please just get me out of here."

\---------------

Castiel sat alone in his room looking down at old pictures of you and him. It had been a year since he lost you, but it might as well have been yesterday.

He, Sam, and Dean had spent hours trying to come up with any possible way to find you; but always came up with nothing. You were gone and with every passing day, his faith in finding you was dissipating. He feared that the love he felt for you and his determination to find you simply would never be enough.

His fingers gently traced the edges of your face on the picture and sighed. "I miss you, Y/N. I love you; more than anything."

He Was interrupted by a quiet gasp followed by a sob coming from the doorway. He stared at you for a moment, trying to process if you were really there or not. "Y/N?"

A gold light flickered behind the tears in your eyes before you turned around and ran. You seemed to be moving impossibly fast as he had trouble catching up to you.

He finally made it outside to see you crying as Lucifer wrapped his arms protectively around you. The two angels locked eyes for a moment; Lucifer grinning menacingly.

Before Castiel could call out to you, Lucifer winked and you both disappeared; leaving Castiel alone once again.

\---------------

Back at the house you called home for the last year, you let go of Lucifer and wiped the tears from your face. "Be honest with me, am I wrong to be fucked up about this? He's happy with whoever the fuck that was; shouldn't I be happy for him?"

You flopped down on your bed and pulled the pillow over your face while Lucifer took a seat next to you, crossing his arms behind his head. "Hmmm, probably."

You pulled the pillow off your face and glared at him. "Really? Would it kill you to be supportive in any way?"

He shrugged defensively. "Hey, don't get mad at me. You told me to be honest; so I was honest. He's clearly moved on and so should you." He softened his tone when he saw a few more stray tears leak down the sides of your face. "But I know it's hard for humans to think logically. You're so full of emotions; but I know that's not your fault. Give it time, Sweetheart."

You sighed. You learned a long time ago that this was as comforting as he could be; at least he was trying. You looked up at him and admired the smile on his face.

In that moment, you finally came to terms with what had become of your life and you were determined to make the most of it. Sitting up, you swung one leg over his his legs and straddled his lap.

Lucifer immediately moved his hands to your hips, but was surprised by your bold move. "W-what are you doing?"

You smoothed your palms up his chest, passed his shoulders, and let your fingertips graze the top ridge of his wings; making him shudder and begin to harden beneath you. "I'm moving on, Luci, and I need your help." You pressed your lips gently against his and whispered, "Make me forget."

\---------------

Castiel had worked tirelessly through the evening to find all the necessary ingredients to summon Lucifer to the bunker. He knew it was stupid, but he needed to know what was going on. He had even resorted to praying to Lucifer as he tried to locate what he needed.

"That's not virgins blood." Lucifer said peering over Castiels shoulder.

Castiel turned to face him, angel blade in hand. "What did you do to her?"

Lucifer grinned and chuckled to himself. "Oh _Cassy_ , what haven't I done to her?"

Scenarios ranging from sex to torture flashed in Castiels mind. "Why was she here, Lucifer? And why did she run from me?"

Lucifer leaned against the library table and crossed his arms. "Oh, that's simple. I needed her to move on and the only way she would is if she knew you already had."

Castiel furrowed his brow in confusion. "I haven't moved on, as you put it. I will never stop until she's freed from you and she knows that."

"Does she?" Lucifer asked mockingly. "Are you entirely sure about that?"

Castiels nostrils flared and he shook his head angrily at the realization of why your eyes looked the way they had. "You planted images in her head. I don't know why I'm even surprised. You're not supposed to treat her like this! You're supposed to protect her and want her to be happy; not lie to her."

Lucifer feigned being wounded. "Hey, I never lied to her; not directly." He tapped his forefinger against his lips and grinned. "And don't worry, baby bro, after last night she's plenty happy."

Castiel knew what Lucifer was implying, but didn't want to believe that he was telling the truth. "You're lying, she wouldn't…"

"Oh but she would." Lucifer gloated. "She practically begged me for it. It's sweet really, I think she might even love me already."

"I'm going to tear you apart!" Castiel growled and rushed Lucifer, only to be tossed backward and pinned to the wall.

"Such anger." Lucifer mocked.

Castiel felt disgusted. He didn't blame you for your actions in the slightest; Lucifer had manipulated you into giving in to him. Guilt washed over him as he thought about how Lucifer was only free because of him. He broke his gaze, unable to look at the archangel who had stolen the one person he loved more than life itself. "Why are you even here?"

"It's simple. I needed to see your face when you realized that I won. You knew she'd eventually choose me. There's nothing you could have done to prevent it." He stepped closer to Castiel and patted him harshly on the shoulder. "Well, this has been a fun little reunion; but I'd hate for her to wake up all alone. Ta-Ta!"

With a gust of wind, Lucifer was gone and Castiel was dropped to his feet. Part of him wanted to continue to wallow in self-pity, hatred, and defeat; but he knew he didn't have time for that. The events of the day only renewed his drive to find you and get you away from Lucifer. He didn't yet know how, but he was ready to spend the rest of his life figuring it out. 


	8. Chapter 8

Lucifer rolled off you with a huff and pulled you to his chest. He grinned up at the ceiling while letting his fingertips drift lazily along your skin. "Told you."

You rolled your eyes, but you couldn't help giggle at the same time. "Yes, yes. The great and powerful Lucifer is always right."

"You can mock me all you want Princess," he cooed as he rolled on top of you again. "but it only makes me want to break the record again."

You giggled as you ran your fingers through his blonde hair. "Such a cocky boy. You think you're such a gift."

"The gift that keeps on giving." He said with a cheeky grin before capturing your lips in another passionate kiss.

Before things to get too heated again you pushed him to roll off you so you could sit up at the edge of the bed. "As much as I'd love to stay in bed with you all day again, I'm starting to get cabin fever. I'm gonna take a shower the go for a walk."

You didn't even have to look back at him to know he was pouting. Since giving him a taste of sexual intimacy, he seemed to crave it non-stop. Knowing he would protest, you didn't even give him a chance to complain. "I need some time to myself, Luci; it's a human thing. I won't be gone for long and I'll make it worth your while when I get back."

He scooted to kneel behind you and lightly kissed your shoulder. "Don't be gone long; you know how I hate to wait."

"Uh-huh." You chuckled and rolled your eyes as you made your way to the bathroom; Lucifers eyes trained on your bare backside as you walked away.

\---------------

You still didn't know the exact location of the house you were living in; but you were surrounded by a lush forest that you enjoyed exploring when you needed some time away from Lucifer. He was good to you, but sometimes you just needed a break from his intensity.

A break with some fresh air was only half the reason you wanted to take this walk though. You were finally letting yourself be happy that Castiel had moved on. You missed and loved him deeply, but found it comforting to know that he wasn't alone; even if it was with someone new.

You had decided that you'd finally pray to him to let him know that you were ok and happy for him. A prayer was a direct line to him, meaning he could easily figure out where you were. You had refused to pray for so long out of fear that he would come looking for you and get himself killed. But now that he had moved on, maybe he would accept that you were ok with your new life.

_"Cas, I'm sorry I didn't do this earlier; but I needed you to be able to move on without me. I'm happy for you; I really am._

_Since I didn't get to say a proper goodbye, I guess this is it. I still love you, baby, and I miss you everyday; but I'm gonna be ok and so are you._

_Goodbye Cas."_

  
\---------------

Castiel, Sam, and Dean were surrounded by piles of books; desperately trying to find some spell to track Lucifer. They had even gone as far to reach out to Crowley and Rowena, whom were both eager to get Lucifer back into the cage for their own reasons.

"Son of a _bitch_!" Dean yelled as he threw a book across the room. "We've been researching, day and night, for months. Why is it so damn difficult to track down the devil."

"We'll find something, Dean." Sam's spoke as though he was trying to convince himself just as much as Dean.

It had only been a few weeks since Castiel saw you in the bunker and his motivation had yet to waver. "We will find them. Just keep looking unti—"

He stood up abruptly as his eyes went wide as he looked down at the confused brothers. "I know where she is."

"What? How..?" Sam questioned.

A glimmer of hope flickered in Castiels eyes as a small smile formed. "She prayed. She finally prayed to me and now I can find her."

His demeanor quickly switched from "hopeful boyfriend" to "Commander" as he started giving Sam and Dean instructions. He explained that both Crowley and Rowena would be needed to assist in the fight with Lucifer.

He knew his plan needed to happen immediately. You would likely not pray to him a second time and would be lost to him again if Lucifer moved you. He knew it was a long shot, but you were worth the risk.

\---------------

Within the hour, Crowley had brought everyone to the location Castiel had told him. They saw the house a few hundred feet away and assumed you were inside.

Lucifer may not have known they were coming, but they had to assume he could sense them the moment they started to search the house.

Castiel immediately grimaced and looked toward the stairs. "They are upstairs… _together_."

Sam and Dean knew better than to react, whereas Crowley couldn't hold back his smirk as Rowena rolled her eyes.

"Lets go, while he's… _distracted_." Castiel growled as he headed up the stairs.

Inside your bedroom, you and Lucifer were too focused on one another to notice Castiel approaching.

Seeing you both in the midst of passion was more overwhelming to Castiel than he had imagined. The sounds you were making and the way your fingers dug into Lucifers shoulders were enough to make him driving an angel blade into his back that much more satisfying.

He knew a simple angel blade wasn't enough to kill him; but could weaken him enough for the powered up Enochian handcuffs to hold him briefly.

Lucifer recoiled with a shout and locked eyes with Castiel. "You. How…?" He began questioning until he looked down at you. "Did you tell him where you were? Oh Princess, you broke our agreement."

He stood up, slipping on his boxers as the cuff dangled from his wrist. "Now I get to kill them and you're still mine. Works for me!"

You quickly pulled the blanket to cover your naked form before the rest of Castiels entourage made it into the room. "What the fuck is going on?" You turned to Lucifer and pleaded with him. "Luci, I swear I didn't tell them. I don't even know where we are!"

"You're in Russia, Love." Crowley quipped. "Beautiful country if you're into that sort of thing."

Lucifer rolled his eyes. "Did you pray to him and don't lie to me."

"I, uh.." you stuttered, not needing to finish to give him your answer.

"Oh, Y/N, I'm so disappointed in you." Lucifer tutted. "I thought we were passed this."

Once again, Lucifer was distracted enough by you to not notice Rowena, who was just outside the room, setting up for the spell to send him back to the cage.

"Whatever." Lucifer said plainly. "We can discuss this after I take care of our guests."

You pleaded with him as he raised his hand to snap his fingers. Both you and Lucifer stared in confusion as nothing happened.

Lucifers eyes drifted to the cuff around his wrist and smirked. "You really think this is going to hold me? What was your plan? Chain me to the radiator?"

"Not exactly." Castiel said flatly as he looked behind him at Rowena who had started chanting. "Just need you powered down long enough to expel you back to the cage."

"The cage?" you asked, more horrified than even you expected. You may not have wanted to be forced to live with him, but you couldn't stomach the idea of him all alone for the rest of eternity. "Why are you even here? He kept up his deal; we aren't bothering anyone."

"See? I told you, Cassy boy, she chose me." Lucifer boasted. "She loves me."

Castiel ignored Lucifers taunting, but looked almost heartbroken at your question. "Isn't it obvious? We're here to bring you home and send him where he belongs."

You had wanted to go home to Castiel, but as far as you knew, he had moved on to someone knew. A hypocritical bitterness rose within you as you thought about having to see him with her again. "Is it even my home anymore? Seems someone else has already taken my place."

"Oh snap! She's got you there." Lucifer snickered while not-so-patiently waiting for the glowing Enochian runes on the handcuffs to wear off.

"It was a lie!" Castiel shouted, "He made you see that. I'll never want anyone else and I'll never stop trying to bring you home to me, where you belong."

Lucifers smile fell from his face. "She belongs with me and she knows it."

You turned toward Lucifer with a scowl. "Luci, you promised you'd never lie to me. Is he telling the truth?"

"Yeah," Lucifer said with a shrug. "But I didn't lie to you; just manipulated the situation a tad. Really it was for your own good; you been much happier since your little visit."

You shuddered at his implication. You had only given yourself over to him once you thought no one would be coming after you. "Cas, I'm sorry…"

"We'll talk about it at home." Castiel said warmly. He didn’t hold anything against you for trying to make the best of your situation.

"She's not going anywhere." Lucifer growled. "She belongs to me and I'm tired of these little games."

"Lucifer," you pleaded. "It doesn't have to be this way. You don't have the upper hand anymore."

"Oh, now don't you worry your pretty little head." Lucifer stepped toward you and patted the top of your head. "I'll take care of your little friends here and then we can finish what we started."

"No." Your harsh tone even surprised you. "I don't want to be here with you. Part of me feels something for you," your eyes drifted to Castiel and a small smile formed on your face. "But not how I feel about Cas. I love him and I belong…"

"With me!" Lucifer finished your sentence with a shout. "We're really going to have to work on that attitude of yours. You're mine and that's final."

"Guys!" Sam shouted. "The warding is started to fail. We need to do this now."

Lucifer still wore his cocky smile as you continued to plead to him. "I don't want to have to send you back, Luci. Please don't do this."

"You won't let them." Lucifer said flatly. "You may not want to admit it, but you love me. You will always choose me in the end."

A single tear rolled down your cheek as you nodded toward Crowley and Rowena. "Do it."

Lucifers eyes widened in shock, anger, and a hint of heartbreak. "No!"

Crowley held a small device covered in Enochian runes that shot a bright light into Lucifers chest, causing him to shout in pain. You hated seeing him hurt; but you knew this was the only way to protect the ones you loved. Lucifer would never stop; he simply didn't know how to give up.

You made eye contact with him as the spell was nearing completion. "I'm sorry, Luci."

He grimaced but forced as small smile. He knew he had been defeated, again, but a small part of him was actually grateful for the time he was able to spend with you. As he could feel his grace drain away from his vessel, he finally admitted what he never wanted to be true. "I love you, Princess."

With the spell complete, the empty vessel fell to the floor with a loud thump. You sat in shock, blankets still pulled up to your neck. "He– he said he loved me…"

Castiel rushed to your side and cupped your cheeks as you continued to stare at the body on the floor. "Y/N, look at me. Are you hurt?"

You slowly looked back up at Castiel as more tears fell. You should have felt relieved; you were finally free from Lucifers grasp. But you almost felt numb. There was a new hole in your heart; similar to all those left behind by all the other people you've lost along the way. "Why couldn't he just listen? Why did he have to be so stubborn?"

Castiel hugged you tightly and stroked your hair. "Archangels aren't known for giving up easily and Lucifer was the most stubborn of all of them."

You sighed and melted against him. "Can we just go home?"

"I'd love nothing more." Castiel said with a small smile.

\---------------

Life returned to as normal as possible back at the bunker. There was still a dull ache in your chest every time you thought about Lucifer; but you reminded yourself that he made his own choice. Had he agreed to leave you alone and behave himself, he could be free right now; he just didn't know how to let go.

And gentle hand on your shoulder pulled from your thoughts. You turned to see Castiel looking concerned. "Is everything alright?"

You forced a smile at him. "Yeah, sorry. Just zoning out."

He sat down next to you and took your hands. "Y/N, it's perfectly understandable to to think of him; to grieve for him even. You were connected and I'd be concerned if you didn't feel the loss."

"It's strange to miss the devil isn't it?" You asked with a sigh.

He smiled and pushed a strand of hair behind your ear. "No stranger than loving an angel."

"I suppose that's true." You said with a laugh. "I do love you Cas and I want you to know that bond or no bond, you're all I want. No matter what Luci said, I will always choose you."

He looked at you like you had said the most profound and meaningful words he had ever heard. "I love you, Y/N, and I will make sure you never regret that choice."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> That's it, folks! Hope you enjoyed the ride.


End file.
